Tuesday, 6 October 2015

Labour's parallel universe

by DAVID CLEGG in Balado, TORCUIL CRICHTON in Morpeth and ALAN COCHRANE in Famagusta.

BUNGLING NAT CHIEFS ARE under fire today after losing the iconic T in the Park festival to Northumberland for a paltry £150k.

The festival, worth an estimated £16 MILLION to the Scots economy, was forced by the local authority to move from its historic Balado base for health and safety reasons. 

But Nats Culture supremo Fiona Hyslop REJECTED a plea from organisers to help fund the move to rural Strathallan - where former Liberal Scots Secretary Michael Moore and ex-Tory MEP Struan Stevenson were educated - despite the emergency relocation cash amounting to less than ONE per cent of the tourist bonanza the festival raked in for the local area, which is just YARDS away from a stream in which ex-Rangers hero Paul Gascoigne once fished.

Opposition MSPs lined up to attack the Nats over the blunder. Labour's Jackie Baillie rapped: "this is absolutely typical of the Nats. This wasn't in their much-derided separation White Paper. Fiona Hyslop's refusal to come to the aid of one of Scotland's most famous cultural events is a disgrace - and the Nats will pay for it at election time. The crust is starting to come off the SNP pie, believe me."

Telly personality and political expert David Torrance was STUNNED by the decision as he was interviewed on BBC Good Morning Scotland, the BBC Scotland News in the afternoon, Reporting Scotland at lunchtime, Reporting Scotland at teatime, Scotland 2015, and an emergency news bulletin presented by a grim-faced Jackie Bird, a single tear ROLLING down her face. 

Torrance, who once WENT to a music festival, SLAMMED the Nats over the blunder, saying "it's time for Nicola Sturgeon to come clean. Frankly, this is why they scraped into government in the first place. The SNP is crumbling at the seams. What's this story about, again?"

Meanwhile, Tory boss Ruth Davidson hit out: "this is absolutely typical of the Nats. This wasn't in their much-derided separation White Paper. Fiona Hyslop's refusal to come to the aid of one of Scotland's most famous cultural events is a disgrace - and the Nats will pay for it at election time".

A feeble Nats press release claiming the funding would BREACH Euro state aid regulations cut no ice with Lib Dem chief Willie Rennie, who laid the law down to the Nats, saying: "this is absolutely typical of the Nats. This wasn't in their much-derided separation White Paper. Fiona Hyslop's refusal to come to the aid of one of Scotland's most famous cultural events is a disgrace - and the Nats will pay for it at election time".

Northumberland County Council, meanwhile, WELCOMED the move, with bosses claiming the switch could be worth up to £16 MILLION to the north-east economy. Council chief Grant Davey said "this is an incredible result for the area. For just a £150,000 outlay, we've secured one of the most lucrative music festivals in Europe. The free advertising alone is going to be worth millions". 

Michelle Mone could not be reached for comment.

No comments:

Post a Comment